“You can do anything you set your mind to.” “If you work hard good things will come to you.” Growing up I heard phrases like this from teachers and other authority figures. The culture in America supports the idea that I can be a self-made man and that my potential is only limited by the scope of my dreams and the effort and discipline that I put into them. Humanity has done great things, curing diseases, vanquishing evil rulers, growing in knowledge and understanding of our world.

My world has told me that I am special and between my potential and those around me I can accomplish anything. It is an incredible message that has been ingrained into our society. And it is only compounded by the fact that my mind tells me the same thing, that the chief end is the exaltation of me. Church for a long time only helped, giving me rules and morals to follow, that way I could have a checklist to show I am better than everyone else and all the more deserving of praise.

Then one day this pastor started talking about grace, a strange idea where God did what I needed most not because of my rule-following and natural abilities but in spite of them. God’s grace told me that I could not live up to the requirements. What a powerful, liberating, and insulting message! Who is this God that he would say that I do not have the ability, intellect, or ability to take care of myself? To save myself?

Slowly it set in the reality is true, I never was quite as good at following the rules as I was at pretending I was following the rules. Even when I was at full capacity I could not out think or reason the parts of my being that weighed me down. The beauty of grace is that it is honest, when the world and my mind are not. It accomplishes what I never can, no matter the encouragement I may receive. Grace is beautiful because it gives me a savior that I cannot earn, please, or repay. And that on that fateful Friday he hung on the tree that I should hang on, his blood was poured out for the punishment and wrath that my selfish, prideful sin deserved. And by this grace I am saved unto a life that does not seek praise or acclaim for myself but for Christ, a life that is happy to be insulted by grace.